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    16 Meaningless Market Phrases That Will Make You Sound Smart On TV

    If you watch financial television all day, like we do, you'll quickly notice something.

    A handful of guests have the confidence to speak actual English and say what they mean. These guests are invaluable: Their opinions are backed up by logic and conviction, they state them clearly, and they make specific statements and recommendations that normal viewers can understand. Even when these guests are wrong, their clarity helps you refine your own opinions--even if you disagree.

    Of course, these guests also expose themselves to all sorts of potential ridicule--if the predictions or statements they make turn out to be wrong. And that's why the vast majority of guests speak a language unique to financial television. This language consists of market phrases that you hear all the time that sound vaguely intelligent but actually don't mean anything.

    The phrases don't sound like they don't mean anything, of course: On the contrary, they appear to mean a lot. In fact, to the inexperienced listener, they make the speaker sound as wise as Warren Buffett (who, to his credit, never speaks this way). The phrases are often inscrutable to lay viewers, leaving them with the impression that, if they don't understand what the guest has just said, it's because they're just too stupid to understand.

    Most of these phrases also have another key benefit, which is especially useful in the investment business: They never commit the speaker to any specific recommendation or prediction. In other words, no matter what happens after the guest removes his or her makeup and returns to their office, they can never be "wrong"--because they didn't actually say anything!

    (And now you understand why you hear these phrases all the time and why they're handy to have in your back pocket in case you get asked a tough question on TV).

    How common are these phrases? If you were to play a drinking game in which you took a shot every time you heard one on financial TV, you'd be passed out cold most days before the market even opened.

    With the help of our readers, we've compiled a few of our favorites. If you have others, please send them along, and we'll add them to the list.

    (NOTE: This list applies to meaningless smart-sounding phrases about the market and investing. We'll follow up with a list of meaningless smart-sounding phrases for corporate executives.)

    Here are 16 Meaningless Market Phrases That Will Make You Sound Smart On TV

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    33 comments

    • Joaquin G  •  11 months ago
      YES!!!!!!!
      I'm so tired of listening to guys going to the show and after 10 minutes I'm still waiting for them to say something.
      My favorite words and when I actually pay attention is when someone says: "I have no clue"
      Then suddently something goes into my head like... wow, this guy knows what he is talking about.
    • Boris  •  11 months ago
      I knew that if I read enough Daily Ticker articles I'd find one that made sense. Every dog has his day.

      Good work, Henry. Not sure when or if I'll ever say that again, but here's credit where credit is due.

      And remember, "Buy the rumor, Sell the news."
    • trollmaster  •  11 months ago
      just don't listen to cramer on cnbc that's the best advise I can give everyone ...
      • Tony 11 months ago
        I STOPPED LISTENING TO HIM AFTER THE FIRST TIME I SAW A VIDEO

        I CAN NOT STAND SOMEONE WHO SHOUTS ABOUT EVERYTHING

        shh don't tell anyone I said this
      • dar3601 11 months ago
        Listen closely to cramer .He is a contrarian indicator.If he says buy ,you short.It works over 60% of the time.
      • frankmargel.com 11 months ago
        ...
    • Jaysun  •  11 months ago
      Loved this topic. Not only do I completely agree, but I have been feeling this way ever since completing a couple investing and financial courses in college. What is even worse is that these financial ego inflated nonsense talking people made me miss out on $300,000. When an oil stock was at $140 a share, I thought that it was going to go down a lot and fast so I wanted to learn about put options so I could make this trade. I went to two different Scottrade offices, each time trying to talk to one of the know-it-alls there and they wouldn't speak English even though I clearly laid it out on what I wanted to do and wanted my answer in plain English. They seems disgusted about the idea of using normal clear words. I'm sure they were thinking, hey, I got a financial degree and have to use the big useless words that learned or what was the point. In fact, they really seamed to enjoy the fact that I didn't understand the useless words that they went to a 4-year college to learn and were really happy when I left more confused than when I came in. I wanted to buy a 6 month expiring put option and was going to put a good amount of money in it and I would've easily made $300,000 in gains as the oil stock went straight down in a matter of two months. Later, I went online and did some of my own research and placed a very small put option sell and buy later and it was a piece of cake. If anyone asked me how to buy and sell options, I can now explain it to them in 1/20 amount of time as those idiots tried to and my words would clearly make sense. Later I walked into one of those same offices to move my branch to a different city since I was so mad that I had missed out on a one in a lifetime market move because of those idiots who just wanted to sound smart. The same guy was there and wanted to know what I was going to invest in next because last time I was so right and must have made a lot on my trade. I told him I missed the opportunity because what I have stated already to you above and he was nervous and walked away. I'm no Warren Buffett and that ended up being my potential one time big score and it was stolen from me. I have had nothing to do with those type of morons (almost everyone in Wall Street) from then on. Sorry I wrote a book here, but it took me awhile to put such a big loss behind me. I did put it behind me, though, because I can't change the past and being mad about it will not only not solve the problem but will make it worse.
      • Tony 11 months ago
        "...one in a lifetime market move..."

        That's another useless phrase, and it makes your entire article meaningless. You simply noticed one pattern and fixated on it to the exclusion of all other opportunities.

        Every business has its own vernacular and slang.

        What they probably wanted you to do was put a whole lot of money down into Scottrade first before they would even consider working with you. Commissions mentality.
      • Joey 11 months ago
        You should have gone to an options broker. Your the idiot.
      • Joey 11 months ago
        And yes I wrote "your" instead of you are (you're) on purpose.
    • G. John M  •  11 months ago
      CNBC is almost, almost, completely useless.
      • Tups 11 months ago
        What part isn't useless?
      • SammyDarlin 11 months ago
        You prefer Fox Bus. News?
        What part of your post isn't useless?
        You can learn a lot, if you care to: What not to do. Who not to listen to.
        What information you need from ethical and educated guests to follow up with your own research based on some of their ideas.
        Information you can't afford to pay for every month regarding stats, etc.
        Money Flows
        Redemptions from Hedge Funds
        Rebalancing of Indexes
        Maybe you should stop trying to say what you think plays into the Thumbs Up crowd and start actually learning something of use to you and your own investments, if you have any.
      • 4-Square 11 months ago
        They're all useless. Unless they have Jim Rogers, Warren Buffet or especially Peter Schiff on. And even then the host is usually constantly interrupting them with their stupid "contrarian" view. When any of these guests are on, the host should just @#$% and let these guys say what they have to say.
    • The_Mick  •  11 months ago
      Excellent article! I've always felt these experts who, like Cramer only beat the S&P by 0.9% over nearly a decade, tell us very little. I always treat them as if they're out at an archeological site doing some digging for me. They turn up objects I might not find on my own and say "ooh! ahh!" Then it's up to me do decide, doing my own research [S&P Reports, Yahoo, Zachs, brokerage, etc. data, then annual reports], if they're worth owning.
    • NVRambo  •  11 months ago
      Nice job guys. Whenever I suspect someone is talking in circles and listening to their own head roar, I estimate they are either selling something and/or have nothing or little of value to say.
    • Markus  •  11 months ago
      Hehe.. love it.
    • Tailgunnar  •  11 months ago
      I used to watch CNBC every day. The a friend gave me a copy of a book called the Prudent Investors Guide to Beating the Market (very hard to find, good luck looking) and I came to realize what a massive waste of time and effort CNBC is. The "pundits" are only interested in trying to look smart so that you will give them your money to handle and they can take 1-2% of it every year. Educate yourself. Turn off the TV. READ. You'll come out far ahead in the long run.
    • Aggman_1998  •  11 months ago
      Here is a piece of advice. You want advice in stocks? Take advice in stocks from the guys that are already retired and made their money in stocks.
    • Name  •  11 months ago
      Something like 80% of all investment newsletters provide advice that would be worse than simply throwing your money in an index fund.
    • Tups  •  11 months ago
      Keep people who use those terms and all academics off the Daily Ticker.
    • RAZ  •  11 months ago
      I really love it, when the market has some small blip move during the day and there is always some "Monday Morning QB" TV/Radio/News commentator explaining what caused it. Totally useless info. As someone once said, better to be un-informed than mis-informed. Academics, are the worst at this game. These no-nothings usually don't even trade or invest.
    • Gerald  •  11 months ago
      Great Clip! Keep up the good work! CNBC / MSNBC are guilty of this... glad to see this.. I wonder if "The Daily Show" is going to pick up on this topic again. Daily Ticker beat them to it... Look forward to seeing more clips of this quality.
    • Lee  •  11 months ago
      would've liked to know the names of the 1 or 2 of your guests who've actually spoken the truth plainly during the last 4 or 5 years.
      know it wouldn't have been todd from miniontown, err.. minionville, eerrr... minced onions on my burger please..
    • Jim  •  11 months ago
      'At the end of the day' makes me want to make it the end of my days
    • bobby  •  11 months ago
      Also, it's rather disingenuous for media-types to critique their interviewees for use of innocuous cliches when they don't give their guests time to expound due to the need to put everything in sound bites in order to maintain audience interest. It would have been better if this article were written by, say, an academic.

      Finally, I would dispute the "cash on the sidelines" comment. Flow of funds toward and away the stock market do occur, associated respectively with higher and lower prices. On the supply side, IPOs and privatizations can change the total shares in the market, although typically this impact is much much smaller than that from changes in demand.
    • 4-Square  •  11 months ago
      Since Blodget wrote this article, I kept waiting for the pro-Obama spin angle. But low and behold it turned out actually be a truthful, bias free article and even entertaining piece about the markets? Whoa, what's happening over there at yahoo, someone spike your coffee? It's a rare day to take a day off from promoting Obama.

      As far as the article is concerned, Peter Schiff is the very best example of someone who speaks in clear terms and analogies that everyone can understand. He tells it like it is and puts his predictions and understanding of what's going on right in your face. He doesn't wiggle in any way. He was out front ten years ago, five years ago, 1 year ago etc long on gold. He was clearly and emphatically saying the US market was going to crash due to easy money and mortgage derivatives..years before it happened, Specific, clear advice and analysis. On the record every time. And the vast majority of the time, he was right. Youtube "Peter Schiff was right" and watch the videos; he's the anti-CNBC talking head.
    • YFU Number One  •  11 months ago
      The market's all about ATTITUDE, so it's okay to talk nonsense. As long as you're a bull, that is. But if you're a bear you'd better keep your mouth shut no matter what, so you don't mess things up for everybody else.
    • CAR  •  11 months ago
      What a joke! The only reason Cramer and friends tell you to buy, is so they can sell and get out.

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