Ken Lindner is probably one of the most powerful men you’ve never heard of. But you do know his clients: Matt Lauer, Lester Holt, Mario Lopez, Robin Meade, Megyn Kelly, Sam Champion, Tom Bergeron, Shepard Smith, and Nancy O’Dell.
As the head of Ken Lindner and Associates, he and his team have worked to promote and shape the careers of some of the most successful people in the entertainment and news industry – an industry famous for outsized and fragile egos.
Since starting his own company in 1988, Lindner says dealing with all those egos has taught him an important life lesson. “What I've learned is that if you make a life or career choice when you are angry, when you are sad; when you feel disrespected, when somebody in the workplace pushes your buttons, when something goes on in connection with a deal that you're making, and it irks you, often times you opt for a quick emotion assuaging fix. You want to have a quick fix, something that makes you feel good for the moment. You lash out. You do something. But often times, that act is inconsistent with what you really want to secure long-term."
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So how is a person supposed to get their emotions and their intellect in line? Lindner offers up his suggestions in his new book, “Your Killer Emotions: The Seven Steps to Mastering the Toxic Emotions, Urges and Impulses that Sabotage You.”
“Well, often times you can be the smartest person in the room. You can have the very best life strategies. But if your emotions cloud your best judgment at crunch time when you're about to make your life choices, and act, you often times can make self-sabotaging acts.”
Lindner says you don’t have to stray too far for examples. "Look what happened to the Lance Armstrong business because he didn't think of the consequences of taking PEDs (performance-enhancing drugs) and allegedly lying. He now is no longer allowed to compete. He had to give back all of this money. His reputation is irreparably damaged. He ruined the Lance Armstrong business."
Armstrong, Lindner says is just like anyone else, "you need to think about the consequences of your acts before you act."
"Well, often times if you feel disrespected, if you are angry, if you feel like people aren't valuing you, you will want to run and do something. You'll wanna run to your manager and tell him or her how you are feeling or to your co-worker, or to someone with whom you're negotiating a deal," Lindner says.
But he cautions if you can cool down, think about the consequences of your acts, and once again, think about what you really want to secure with every life choice, then he says, "hopefully the strength of your emotions will dissipate. And you will make a life choice which is consistent with what you cognitively know is the right thing for you."