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Suze Orman Money Matters

Suze Orman, Money Matters

The 8 Qualities of a Wealthy Woman

by Suze Orman

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Posted on Monday, February 12, 2007, 12:00AM

Women & Money: Owning the Power to Control Your DestinyWhat keeps women from achieving the financial security they -- and their families -- deserve? I believe the root of the problem lies in the dysfunctional relationship women have with money.

That's the launching point for my new book, "Women & Money: Owning the Power to Control Your Destiny." My message to all women: Owning the power to control your destiny requires more than 401(k)s and Roth IRAs. It requires reconditioning from the inside. In this excerpt from "Women & Money," I discuss the eight qualities of wealthy women.

Qualities 1 and 2: Harmony and Balance

Harmony is an agreement in feeling, approach, and sympathy. It is the pleasing interaction between what you think, feel, say, and do.

Balance is a state of emotional and rational stability in which you are calm and able to make sound decisions and judgments.

Harmony and balance are perhaps the most important qualities of all, for they serve as the foundation for the remaining qualities. When you possess true inner harmony, what you think, say, feel, and do is one. We are so accustomed to this split-screen state of mind in which we think one thing, say another, feel something else, and act in a way that has nothing to do with what we just thought, said, or felt. When your thoughts, feelings, words, and actions are not in harmony, it shows up as an imbalance -- you feel agitated, uncomfortable, you sense something is off, so you find it difficult to make rational, calm decisions. This is why these two qualities are a pair.

Quality 3: Courage

Courage is the ability to face danger, difficulty, uncertainty, or pain without being overcome by fear or being deflected from a chosen course of action.

Courage gives harmony expression. When your thoughts and feelings are one, courage helps you manifest them in the form of words and actions. When you are afraid to speak or act, courage helps you overcome your fear. Courage gives you the ability to speak your truth, even when it is not what others may want to hear.

Fear is usually what stands between us and our courage. But if we are to embrace this quality of courage to its fullest, we can no longer allow ourselves to hide behind fear. You can meditate on your fear and think about it rationally and try to will it away, but in the end, if fear is preventing you from acting, you must find your courage and act to overcome your fear.

Quality 4: Generosity

Generosity is when you give the right thing to the right person at the right time -- and it benefits both of you.

Generosity is a quality that most women can tap into very easily -- maybe too easily. As women, we tend to be overly generous with our time, support, love, and money -- but giving simply for the sake of giving does not match the definition of true generosity.

True generosity goes far beyond what you give to others. In giving there is a power, an understanding that you are just the vessel that wealth or energy flows through. You allow money to come in through your hands and out through your heart. To be empowered to give, to be moved to give straight from the heart, is a feeling that all the money in the world could never buy. So let me ask you: Is that how you feel when you constantly give of yourself? Do you feel enhanced or do you feel diminished? You think of yourself as a giver, as generous with your time, your talent, your money. Others probably describe you as a generous woman, but if I were to look at you, I might think you give for the wrong reasons. Do you give because you feel that you should? Do you give out of guilt or embarrassment? Understand that true generosity is as much about the one who gives as it is about the one who receives. If an act of generosity benefits the receiver but saps the giver, then it is not true generosity.

Quality 5: Happiness

Happiness is a state of well-being and contentment.

When you find the courage to live your life in harmony and balance, when you understand and practice generosity in the truest sense, happiness spontaneously appears. When you are happy, you are open and accessible. When you are happy, you tend to be more optimistic. You approach new challenges with a clear mind that seeks positive solutions. You see possibilities rather than problems.

Happiness is not a luxury. It is a necessity for true wealth. When you are happy, you have the satisfaction of knowing that your actions come from a place of purity and balance, that they are correct and generous and kind. There are no regrets in this state of happiness -- and that's a goal worth striving for in all areas of your life.

Quality 6: Wisdom

Wisdom is the knowledge and experience needed to make sensible decisions and judgments, or the good sense shown by the decisions and judgments made from an accumulated knowledge of life that has been gained through experience.

The quality of wisdom is more than intellectual, and it is in no way related to how much schooling you have. Exercising wisdom requires cutting through the noise of life and tapping into your core beliefs to make thoughtful decisions. Wisdom results from inhabiting all the qualities that came before it. A wise woman recognizes when her life is out of balance and summons the courage to act to correct it. A wise woman knows the meaning of true generosity. A wise woman knows happiness is the reward for a life lived in harmony, with courage and grace. A wise woman knows how to summon her courage and do what is right, rather than what is easy.

Quality 7: Cleanliness

Cleanliness is a state of purity, clarity, and precision.

Cleanliness is about respecting the importance of order and organization. When you don't know where your money is, when you have no filing system for your important documents, when you dive into your pocketbook to pull out crumpled bills, when your car looks like a garbage can, when your closets are filled with junk and clutter -- you cannot possibly be a wealthy woman. You need to clean up your act -- quite literally -- to bring true wealth into your life. In India, women sweep the front entrance to their home each morning as a way of welcoming Lakshmi, the goddess of material and spiritual abundance, into their home, for there is a belief that she resides at the threshold of every house. In order for her to enter, she must have a clear path.

You might be reading this and thinking that cleanliness is nice but not essential to your financial well-being. I am here to tell you that if this quality is not up front and center, wealth will elude you and you will be left with the mess that you created. Respect the power of this quality of cleanliness. Tell the universe that you have cleared the path for wealth and abundance to enter.

Quality 8: Beauty

Beauty is the quality or aggregate of qualities in a person that gives pleasure to the senses or pleasurably exalts the mind or spirit.

Beauty is what you create when you incorporate the other seven qualities into your life. When you take the steps to have harmony, balance, courage, generosity, happiness, wisdom, cleanliness, and beauty in your life, you will exude confidence in who you are. And there is nothing more beautiful than a confident woman. Remember, when you are confident you feel secure, and when you feel secure you have no fear. And when you have no fear, you have the courage to say what you think and feel in a calm and wise way. And when you are calm, you make wise decisions with your money, which then allows you to be truly generous to others as well as yourself, which, in turn, makes you a happy, powerful, and beautiful woman. Do you see how all of these qualities work together to help you arrive at the goal of being a woman in control of her destiny?

Summoning the 8 Qualities

I've noticed, in my own life and in others', that the more you summon these qualities, the easier they are to access. Harmony yearns for more harmony, and balance abhors imbalance. Courage begets greater courage. Once you are generous in the right way, a lesser form of generosity will feel inferior to you. True happiness will never permit you to settle for a lesser form of happiness. Cleanliness recoils at disorder. Wisdom, once achieved, is with you forever, and beauty inspires beauty in all things.

Carry these qualities with you throughout your life. Write them on a notecard and keep them close at hand -- in your wallet or in your pocket. Make it into a talisman to guide you every day as you make your way through life and all its impossible demands. These qualities will keep you focused and tranquil. Let them and they will offer you constant reassurance that you are acting powerfully and correctly, with love in your heart and the purest intentions, to realize your goals of security and comfort for yourself and all you love.

(Click here for a schedule of Suze's "Women & Money" U.S. book tour.)

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604 Comments

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  • Yahoo! Finance User - Thursday, October 25, 2007, 9:41AM ET  Report Abuse

    • Overall: 5/5

    For those who slam suze for just making money off poor women, I'd like to ask you this question: Did you have to pay her anything to read this article on the Internet? Probably not, which I think says it all. Read, internalize, and prosper....

  • Danica - Thursday, September 13, 2007, 9:29AM ET  Report Abuse

    • Overall: 5/5

    This makes lots of sense. I am glad that there is someone out there like Suze who is willing to not take advantage of women and to teach us how to be financally sound. It's about time someone take the time to explain it all. I have read her books and in no way is she bias, I do think she has the right idea directing some teachings at women simply because women tend to be taken advantage of more often than men. PS ....My husband and I both have jobs and take turns picking up the check! Sounds like some of these whiney guys just need a good woman.

  • Nancy J Howser - Thursday, August 30, 2007, 5:49PM ET  Report Abuse

    • Overall: 5/5

    Suze Orman is one of the most intelligent women I have ever heard. I only wish I could have heard her when I was much younger. I would have been a much happier and wealthier person today.

  • Sophia - Tuesday, August 28, 2007, 9:24AM ET  Report Abuse

    • Overall: 5/5

    There seems that many people on here who like to whine, cry, complain and bicker. You are missing the point! Suze has some great advice. You do not have to follow every tip she offers. Take bits and pieces and apply them to your life as you see fit. For those who say they can't be apply these 8 simple tips to their lives...just because you are in debt or experiencing hardships does NOT mean that you cannot. Loathing in self-pity will not help your situation. Try thinking positively and focus on how you can change your situation!

  • blue_misty_star - Tuesday, August 21, 2007, 6:05PM ET  Report Abuse

    • Overall: 5/5

    I THINK SUZE IS A VERY INTELLIGENT LADY THAT KNOWS HER STUFF

  • Annonymous - Thursday, August 9, 2007, 12:12PM ET  Report Abuse

    • Overall: 1/5

    Ho-hum Suze. This is perfectly in line with what we have come to expect from you. I find it border-line offensive that your 'advice' is always for women. The sad thing is that your advice is not even very good. If I had a dollar for every Tom, Dick, and Sherry passing out advice on how to be a millionaire, I would have another million dollars and another reason not to read your new boring article/book. You only write and direct your advice for women because you are a lesbian (not that there is anything wrong with that) and have some pent up bias toward men. How you got on TV or even get to write about finance will always be a mystery to me....yawn - time to get back to some real finance reading.....

  • Yahoo! Finance User - Thursday, August 2, 2007, 12:00PM ET  Report Abuse

    • Overall: 1/5

    Suze is a strange woman. I would not rely on her advice on money or life. She does not practice what she preaches and is just trying to sell books and her financial products by being outrageous and saying things that get people stirred up emotionally.

  • Yahoo! Finance User - Monday, July 23, 2007, 2:47PM ET  Report Abuse

    • Overall: 5/5

    As I've gotten older, I've realized that to create what I want (whether that be money, a situation, a lifestyle, etc.) I need to be in a balanced, harmonious place. I hear what some people are saying here; when all you can think about is survival, the 8 points seem irrelevant. I don't think that's true, based on personal experience. (OK, maybe for ME it wasn't true). Bringing good things into your life begins from within yourself. That's true wealth, not just $$.

  • Yahoo! Finance User - Thursday, June 21, 2007, 1:18PM ET  Report Abuse

    • Overall: 4/5

    In the society that we live in, where certain freedoms are guaranteed and certain efforts are made for the less fortunate, it comes as no surprise to me that some previous readers are spitefully angry that the article in question isn't a magic bullet to solve all their problems. Americans take for granted many things that it never occurs to other nations to even ask for. There are a lot of people who have somehow reached adulthood without gaining meaningful maturity; specifically the wherewithall to gain insight from information that may not be (currently) useful to themselves. The issue at hand is not to be solved through childish ad hominem attacks on Suze Orman, (indeed, the issue hasn't anything at all to do with Orman, the issue is the development of self to attain wealth, however you define it) the key is to have developed enough perspective to be able to determine what in your character you should enhance in order to smooth obstacles between you and your goals. The chances that you will read an article posted online to the masses that is literally addressed to you and will be completely applicable to you--and you alone--are nil. If that is what you expect to see online, you may be almost pathologically selfish. The biggest mistake out there, whether your are a man or woman, young or old, is to disregard sensible advice. Not disregarding sensible advice doesn't mean you have to take it, or even adhere to it completely, but choosing ignorance or arrogance over potential opportunity is a sad state to find yourself in.

  • Jordan - Monday, June 18, 2007, 1:39PM ET  Report Abuse

    • Overall: 5/5

    Since reading Suze's book, I have implemented many of her suggestions into my life. As a mid 20's single woman who was recently in debt over 30K, and with a credit rating diminished below poor (both circumstance of some very poor choices I made right out of college), many readers may find my story inspirational. I am currently one year away from paying off all debt, my credit rating jumped considerably over the past two years (was recently able to qualify for a credit card again--and within Suze's suggested APR), have a 401K, a savings account, and a Save Yourself Account (promoted in the rest of Suze's book). I am so excited to recommend Suze's book to other women out there who have faced the same struggles as myself--or perhaps worse! It is truly revolutionary how women can help other women--especially in the often untouched-by-women realm of finances and personal wealth & development.

  • terrabeam - Wednesday, April 18, 2007, 2:52PM ET  Report Abuse

    • Overall: 1/5

    it is somthing I have read in another book

  • Frederick - Monday, April 16, 2007, 4:45PM ET  Report Abuse

    • Overall: 5/5

    What do I like most about this article? Work on focusing self and wealth will follow. I think the quest for wealth and the quest for spirituality is the same journey. They each have their own rules, but you have to follow both of them to get the results you really want. Thanks Suze.

  • Sharon - Wednesday, April 11, 2007, 8:32PM ET  Report Abuse

    • Overall: 2/5

    Still luv ya, Suze. But I like the old practical advice. My girlfriends are worried about making rent, but they rent funiture, belong to a tanning salon, a gym (they don't go too), pay for cable, buy $4 coffee, cash out their 401k going from job to job. Have bad credit but buy a car at 19% interest, pay for 5 years and owe the same amount!! It goes on and on. You know you've heard it..... My family is doing great thanks to you and others like you. I am still working on my girlfriends and I often suggest your books. All my best.

  • melody - Saturday, April 7, 2007, 7:17PM ET  Report Abuse

    • Overall: 5/5

    AWESOME SUZE I AM DIGESTING EVERY WORD FROM THIS ARTICLE AND I THANK U.

  • Yahoo! Finance User - Saturday, April 7, 2007, 12:59PM ET  Report Abuse

    • Overall: 5/5

    Fabulous and inspiring! And though these 8 rules may not apply to all women Suze, I find value and meaning in them all...thank you!

  • Yahoo! Finance User - Sunday, March 25, 2007, 6:41PM ET  Report Abuse

    • Overall: 5/5

    Suze is just so sensible!

  • Barbara - Saturday, March 24, 2007, 8:46PM ET  Report Abuse

    • Overall: 3/5

    I think this is something all of us need to do more of. I'm am trying really hard to work on getting out of debt and not being afrad.

  • JOHN - Sunday, March 18, 2007, 5:10PM ET  Report Abuse

    • Overall: 5/5

    This brings to me a new perspective on these traits that I like to try to keep in balance in my life. I like reading and bringing new ideas and thoughts that would help me through my daily walk . Your thoughts are so right on, and as you suggest, I am going to keep the list in my purse as a reminder and rememberence of your insight. I use the turtle as my symbol of paitience. Your are a wise woman. thanks

  • Yahoo! Finance User - Sunday, March 18, 2007, 4:54PM ET  Report Abuse

    • Overall: 5/5

    With consumer debt as high as it is in this country, and sky rocketing taxes, everyone could use some advice on how to make our hard earned dollars work to our advantage. If you don't find her comments interesting and informative, then you don't, but leaving comments that attack her on a personal level only shows your ignorance and poor manners. We do live a free society if you don't like what information is being published, then don't read it or change the channel. Rudeness is not acceptable. Tmc in Michigan

  • Yahoo! Finance User - Saturday, March 17, 2007, 8:26AM ET  Report Abuse

    • Overall: 4/5

    Can't get enough of this woman. She is an all powerful lady speaking the things that I have believed for years about men, women and couples. Financial laws apply to all. Maybe I'll visit the bookstore today!

  • Shirlie - Friday, March 16, 2007, 5:43PM ET  Report Abuse

    • Overall: 5/5

    Reading this brings on a feel good feeling even while I am recognizing my own shortcomings. Will it help me correct some of those things in my life is of course up to me .

  • monnikka c - Friday, March 16, 2007, 2:44PM ET  Report Abuse

    • Overall: 4/5

    i think that was a very helpful story for the young the old n the new thanks very much

  • LOIS - Thursday, March 15, 2007, 3:54PM ET  Report Abuse

    • Overall: 4/5

    This was very encouraging as I am not working and am trying to help with our budget as my husband is retired also. Thank you, I needed this.

  • Yahoo! Finance User - Tuesday, March 13, 2007, 7:22PM ET  Report Abuse

    • Overall: 1/5

    Yawn...21 year old girl agrees whole heartedly. What a load of bull. It's interesting how wealthy people in general don't embrace these "qualities" or strange eastern religious customs untill after they become rich and successful. The key to becoming rich and successful no matter what sex you are is to lie cheat and steal whenever possible. Nobody gets to be wealthy by being honest, unless they're an heir to a fortune already. Even you, Suze, are a conartist. It's very "generous" of you to impart your "wisdom" on us poor unsuccessful women, for a small fee so that you can line your purse with green. Ladies, let's make a "wise" monitary decision and and instead of wasting our precious money on this loon's book, we can buy a pair of clearance shoes and a Starbuck's, and induldge in a little "happiness" what do you think?

  • Yahoo! Finance User - Tuesday, March 13, 2007, 1:21PM ET  Report Abuse

    • Overall: 5/5

    Suze Rocks!! At least she is doing something productive in her life and making a difference in people's lives. It does start from within. Those who don't like this article must be having a difficult time with their finances and are bitter about her positive outlook and success. Don't be jealous people. Seek the truth and the truth will set you free. Keep up the excellent work Suze!

  • Yahoo! Finance User - Tuesday, March 13, 2007, 2:14AM ET  Report Abuse

    • Overall: 3/5

    I just watched Suze on PBS. Had never listened to her before or read any of her books. When she discussed the Eight Qualities of a Wealthy Woman, I figured she was talking about internal wealth of character, not monetary wealth. Obviously these eight qualities don't apply to money management. Her whole point is that women have a "dysfunctional relationship" with money which keeps them from being wealthy. She's saying women need to be strong on the inside before they can be financially strong. Perhaps this is her pep talk to encourage inner strength which, she may believe, will in turn beget external wealth. I don't think there is anything magically sequential about these qualities. They are important in and of themselves, but they don't necessarily build upon each other in some sort of mystical heirarchy of needs. Character is important for character's sake, but it may not bring to us material wealth, or help us keep it!

  • Howard - Monday, March 12, 2007, 10:41PM ET  Report Abuse

    • Overall: 1/5

    When is there going to be an article for men. This column is so lopsided, articles aimed at women by far outnumber articles for men. What happened to equality?

  • Lady Ardwinna/ Watertigeress - Monday, March 12, 2007, 10:22PM ET  Report Abuse

    • Overall: 5/5

    Hmm. maybe inviting the Goddess into our life can have many beneficial advantages in our lives. I applaud the wisdom Ms Orman's words and her use of a goddess as an example to us all, once upon a time in a land far far away woman ruled their homes with love kindness and devotion. Somewhere down through history that was lost as powers in the world changed with violence now our history. Its nice to be reminded of woman who have taken back the control of their lives again and to help those of us who forgot how and give us encouragement. Im not a feminist or any kind of zealot I just recognize the truth when I see it. Blessed Be

  • Mary M - Monday, March 12, 2007, 6:31PM ET  Report Abuse

    • Overall: 5/5

    Suze has this right on the nose! Feminist b.s.? NO!! I am just now starting to realize everything about myself that I have suppressed for years because of a man. I am everything that Suze states in the 8 things. I am finally starting to get it right at the age of 40. And some of the answers I've read about being laid off of work, blah, blah, blah...quit feeling sorry for yourself and accept it as an opportunity to do something better for yourself. I wonder how much time they spend in front of a t.v. watching crap for entertainment..do they smoke? quit, I bet they could save $140.00 a month that they could use for food etc. Are they a true Christain? No, I don't spend any time in a church because I believe that God is in me, in my heart, I treat everyone no matter where they come from with true respect. That gets returned tenfold by being a good person. Sometimes people need to stop and think about what is true wealth...I want financial stability also, but I am truely wealthy in other areas of my life that I no longer take forgranted.I have goals that I will obtain and it will take time to achieve them but I will be grateful for the ride as I get there. And by the way, I only make $18,00.00 a year right now but I know now that my true wealth is just around the corner because I am all of those 8 things that Suze listed, I just never implemented them in my life until I filed for a divorce. So many things have come my way in the past 7 months that I can only see even more happiness as I utilize and truely be those 8 things.Teinsy

  • BeverlyB - Monday, March 12, 2007, 6:20PM ET  Report Abuse

    • Overall: 4/5

    to posess these qualities can do nothing but help you grow more and more confindent as a successful business woman . It may be old stuff but it still rings true today. B A B! OH

Showing comments 6-35 of 604<< PreviousNext >>
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Own the Power to Control Your Destiny

Women & Money

With her signature mix of insight and compassion, Suze Orman equips women with the financial knowledge and emotional awareness to overcome the blocks that have kept them from making more out of the money they earn.

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