Ben Stein How Not to Ruin Your Life

Now for some decidedly non-PC thoughts.

I hear a lot of bragging from my pals about how their daughter got into Brown or their son is being courted by Goldman Sachs or their grandchild just got into a fancy prep school.

Worth Bragging About

What I never hear is bragging from parents who say, "My son just got into the Army Special Forces and is risking his life to keep your son and you alive." I never hear parents saying that their kids got into the 82nd Airborne and are now fighting in Afghanistan to give people there a decent life and keep Al-Qaeda tied down so they don't come here to attack us.

Now, you may say, "All well and good, and it's great that these military families are so modest. But what does this have to do with me?"

It has everything to do with you, my friend.

Why It Matters

First, the military people on the ground -- and those in the ground in Section 60 of Arlington National Cemetery -- are the ones who keep your family alive. They're the ones who comprise the wall around America so that we can play and make money for our retirement and enjoy our children. They, whether in training or in traction, are the ones who keep America humming and keep the noblest dream of freedom alive in our hearts.

Again, you may say, "I agree and honor them, but what does this have to do with a column about money, careers, and finance?" Again, everything.

Day after day I get letters from readers who complain about their jobs and their lives. They have dead-end careers. They have bosses who disrespect them. They have colleagues who are strangers. I know that world. I've been in it.

Real Job Satisfaction

But I also get letters aplenty from men and women in the military. They love their jobs. They do exciting work. Dangerous, of course, but exciting. They have immense responsibilities. They get challenged on a scale they would never have dreamed conceivable. They bring more out of themselves than they knew they had.

Yes, they don't get paid as much as they should. But their pay isn't terrible, and they get extraordinary benefits. More than that, they wake up each morning feeling that they matter. They never have to worry if they're making a difference in the world, because they know there would be no civilized world without them. Their colleagues on the battlefield not only treat them with respect, they would give up their lives for them. They have each other's backs in the real sense of the phrase. (Please, someone at a Wall Street firm, tell me if your colleagues feel the same way about you.)

In short, dear reader, you might want to consider a career in the military. The world needs you, and it just might make you feel like you're doing something very worthwhile with your life.

Light at the End of the Tunnel

Second, I want you to think about retirement in a serious, truthful way. This will tell you that while you're going to be fairly vigorous and sprightly for the first part of your golden years, you possibly won't be for all of them. You'll get a bit weak, often more than a bit confused, and generally not totally "there" for your duties and responsibilities.

This is one of the many reasons I love and recommend variable annuities, which you then convert into a lifetime annuity. Once you've set the annuity on autopilot and start adding to it (always with an eye on fees), it compounds month after month free from tax.

True, when you start withdrawing from it, you have to pay income tax on the amount of gains in the account. But for most Americans, that rate is now extremely low. And you get that check from the insurance company or financial house as regularly as clockwork. It mounts up and up during your contributing years, and then you get the money through the mail.

You don't have to study the market. You don't have to worry about ups and downs. The money just comes in every month or every quarter and you live on it. And it's guaranteed to be there until you die, or for some specified number of years thereafter.

Old age, especially the part of old age that involves loss of powers, is frightening enough for anyone. Old age that involves fear of financial insecurity is truly horrifying. Annuities are a safe, easily accessible, low-cost (if you keep an eye on fees) way out of that desolate valley. Keep them in mind, even if others mock them. They work.

Hardly Working

Finally, I have a correspondent who endlessly asks me if I know ways to get rich that don't involve much work so she won't miss her pedicures. She also wants to work only with nice people who are also smart.

I hate to break this to her and to everyone in her situation, but there's no such job. Making money takes hard work. The people who do it well make it look easy, but it isn't. It's hard work. Get used to it. And the people you work with aren't always nice, either.

There's no royal road to quick wealth. Hard work and disciplined, sensible savings will get you there. Not pedicures.