You date insult the great LORD ZALICON??? The holy life giver from his supple teets of mercy? You shall bow to him and give thanks as his presence in this earth is a gift...if you reject this gift LORD ZALICON will unleash his holy #$%$ of might and destroy you with the flick of his wrist. ALL HAIL LORD ZALICON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
GREETINGS MY FELLOW ZALCONIANS!!!! YES, it is I, your faithful leader LORD ZALICON. I have returned from the depths of the 7th level of hell and I have successfully conquered the king of the Bearzonites, Lord Beardrius. I crushed him with one swift swing of my mightly Zalicon rod and stuff him with my zalconians goo. Let this day be know as Zalcony and be forever celebrated as the day LORD ZALICON returned home and brought great profits to the Zalconian people. ALL HAIL LORD ZALICON for he is the life giver from hit teets of strength and prosperity.