Is this Tyrone Shooz ? Pull those drawers up boy. Why won't anyone hire you ? It's so unfair.
Saw ads for sales jobs at Brooks Brothers (hey you're a brother, right ?) and Nordstrom - go get em. Both have very fair labor policies. Good 401's too. Kind of like a sophisticated handout. Ah, never mind - will explain later once you get in.
Don't forget to bring your resume and references - you'll wow them !!! And have pitchers of the chilrin too. They are often impressed with family guys.
Best of Luck and Warm Wishes.