Whenever I'm opening a door, I always check to see if someone is behind me. If so, I let the door go at just the right time so if they're not looking, it would hit them in the face. It's my dream to hit a democrat in the face with one of those heavy doors at Neiman Marcus.
Similarly, if someone is holding a door for me, I always slow down. It makes me look more important and wastes their time.
My father taught me these things and he was a great republican.