I think his timing model works like this...
1) He drinks a whole bottle of Goldschlager trying to ease the pain of his losses during the day.
2) Takes a dump the next morning. Sees flecks of gold on the TP (that's how his timing model is put on paper) & in the toilet.
3) Flushes, & thinks "It's an omen! Gold is going down the toilet!" Does not have an understanding of basic plumbing.
4) Gets on Yahoo MB's & types his drivel, inventing new imaginary friends on the way.
5) Watches in shock & awe as the POG climbs yet again. Seriously works on denying reality.
6) Goes to collect cans to trade in for the deposit, so he can buy a bottle of Goldschlager.
7) Go to 1.