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  • wapiti126 wapiti126 Sep 19, 2003 10:18 PM Flag

    last one for bovinepoor

    >>My memory for names and such is so bad I can't remember the names of folks two seconds after being introduced. Sometimes it can be really embarrassing...<<

    you'n'me both.

    of course you know David Allen Coe's version of the song "You Never Even Called Me By My Name" (AKA know as the 'Perfect Country Western Song') written by Steve Goodman and [although he won't admit it] you-know-who. yet it's not on any of what's-his-name's albums.


    as sung by Steve Goodman in London, Aug 8, 1976..................

    [spoken] This is a song I wrote with John Prine 4 years ago (1972) and we tried to put into one song, everything that had ever been in any of the country and western songs we had ever heard. Tried to put it all into one song. Serves us right. This is what came out:

    Well it was all I could do to keep from cryin'
    Some times it seems so useless to remain
    You're the one who always tried to change me
    And that is why I will always stay the same

    Chorus:
    But I'll hang around as long as you will let me
    I never minded standing in the rain
    You don't have to call me darlin', darlin'
    But you never even call me by my name

    No, you don't have to call me Freddy Fender
    You don't have to call me Charlie Pride
    You don't have to call me Merle Haggard anymore
    Even though you know you're on my fighting side

    Chorus- this verse only:
    And I'm gonna hang around as long as you will let me
    I never minded standing in the rain (when nights are cold and lonely)
    You don't have to call me darlin', darlin'
    But you never even call me by name.

    [musical by mouth improv done in a Merle Haggard-like tone -no words]

    [spoken] I've seen my name, a few times in the phone book
    [spoken] And on the neon sign above the bar I used to own
    [spoken] And there's only one thing I'm really sure of was that sucker
    You're gonna hear it when my savior calls me home

    [spoken] That's a lot to get into one song. We left out all the good stuff. Dallas, dope, divorce, dead dogs, trains prison Christmas, mothers, farms, and trucks. Mothers, prison, trucks, trains, farms, Christmas, and dead dogs are essential, you can't have a good country song without them things. And with all due respect this song needs mothers, prison, trucks, trains, farms, Christmas and dead dogs and is that it? Whatever it is - it's also 4 minutes long already (they're going 'when's he gonna end, when's he gonna end in the booth back there') So I'll just tack this verse on the end here-

    Ever since the dog died and mama went to prison
    Ain't nothin' round this old farm that's been the same
    [Spoken] You know when mom broke out last Christmas
    She drove the getaway laundry truck into a train

    Chorus:
    But I'll hang around as long as you will let me
    I never minded standing in the rain
    You don't have to call me darlin', darlin'
    But you never even call me by my name

    mooo!

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    • Let's Talk Dirty in HawaIIan
      John Prine/Fred Koller

      I packed my bags and bought myself a ticket
      For the land of the tall palm tree
      Aloha Old Milwaukee, Hello Waikiki
      I just stepped down from the airplane
      When I thought I heard her say
      Waka waka nuka nuka, waka waka nuka nuka
      Would you like a lei? Eh?

      cho: Let's talk dirty in Hawaiian
      Whisper in my ear
      Kicka poo ka maka wa wah wahini
      Are the words I long to hear
      Lay your coconut on my tiki
      What the hecka mooka mooka dear
      Let's talk dirty in Hawaiian
      Say the words I long to hear

      It's a ukulele Honolulu sunset
      Listen to the grass skirts (A) sway
      Drinking rum from a pineapple
      Out on Honolulu Bay
      The steel guitars all playing
      While she's talking with her hands
      Gimme gimme oka doka make a wish and wanta polka
      Words I under stand

      I boughta lota junka with my moola
      And sent it to the folks back home
      I never had the chance to dance the hula
      I guess I should have known
      When you start talking to the sweet wahini
      Walking in the pale moon light
      Oka doka what a setta knocka rocka sis boom bocas
      Hope I said it right

      Aloha

 
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