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Abbott Laboratories Message Board

  • LadySpirit48 LadySpirit48 Oct 18, 2003 8:41 AM Flag


    For all of you who occasionally have a really bad day, and
    you just need to take it out on someone, don't take it out
    on someone you know, take it out on someone you don't know.

    I was sitting at my desk, when I remembered a phone call I
    had forgotten to make. I found the number, and dialed it. A
    man answered saying, "Hello?"

    I politely said, "This is Fred Hanifin, could I please speak
    with Robin Carter?" Suddenly, the phone was slammed down on
    me. I couldn't believe that anyone could be so rude.

    I tracked down Robin's correct number, and called her. (I had
    transposed the last two digits of her phone number). After
    hanging up with her, I decided to call the "wrong number"
    again. When the same guy answered the phone, I yelled, "You're
    an asshole!" and hung up.

    I wrote his number down, with the word "asshole" next to it,
    and put it in my desk drawer. Every couple of weeks, when I
    was paying bills or had a really bad day, I'd call him up and
    yell, "You're an asshole!". It always cheered me up.

    When Caller ID came to our area, I thought my therapeutic
    "asshole" calling would have to stop. So, I called his number
    and said, "Hi, this is John Smith from the Telephone Company.
    I'm just calling to see if you're familiar with the Caller ID
    program?" he yelled, "NO!" and slammed the phone down. I
    quickly called him back and said, "That's because you're an

    So, one day I was at the store, getting ready to pull into a
    parking spot. Some boy in a black BMW cut me off, and pulled
    into the spot I had patiently waited for. I hit the horn and
    yelled that I had been waiting for the spot. The idiot ignored
    me. I noticed a "For Sale" sign in his car window, so I wrote
    down his number.

    A couple of days later, right after calling the first asshole
    (I had his number on speed dial), I thought I had better call
    the BMW asshole, too.. I dialed and someone said, "Hello?" I
    said, "Is this the man with the black BMW for sale?" "Yes it
    is. "Can you tell me where I can see it?"

    "Yes, I live at 1802 West 34th Street. It's a yellow house
    and the car's parked right out front."

    "What's your name?" I asked. "My name is Don Hansen," he
    said. "When's a good time to catch you, Don?" "I'm home every
    evening after five." "Listen, Don, can I tell you something?"
    "Yes?" "Don, you're an asshole!" Then I hung up, and added his
    number to my speed dial, too. Now, when I had a problem, I had
    two assholes to call...

    But after several months of calling them, it wasn't as enjoy-
    able as it used to be. So, I came up with an idea: I called
    Asshole #1.

    "You're an asshole!" (but I didn't hang up).
    "Are you still there?" he asked.
    "Yeah", I said.
    "Stop calling me", he screamed "Make me", I said.
    "Who are you?" he asked.
    "My name is Don Hansen."
    "Where do you live?"
    "Asshole, I live at 1802 West 34th Street, a yellow house
    with my black Beemer parked in front."
    He said, "I'm coming over right now, Don. And you had better
    start saying your prayers."
    I said, "Yeah, like I'm really scared, asshole."

    Then I called asshole #2.
    "Hello?" he said.
    "Hello Asshole", I said...
    He yelled, "If I ever find out who you are...."
    "You'll what?" I said.
    "I'll kick your ass", he exclaimed.
    I answered, "Well, asshole, here's your chance. I'm coming
    over right now".

    Then, I hung up, and immediately called the police, saying
    that I lived at 1802 West 34th Street, and I was on my way
    over there to kill my gay lover. Then, I called Channel 13
    news about the gang war going down on West 34th Street... I
    quickly got into my car and headed over to 34th Street.

    There, I saw two assholes beating the crap out of each other
    in front of 6 squa

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    • AOK...

      I am honored and humbled by your kind remarks.Seriously do take a look at STY. John Brown has guided this company for over 20 years and has faithfully grown sales and earnings by 20%/yr,except after the merger of Howmedica from PFE. Has almost completely paid off all of the debt related tothe merger and is an aggressive acquiror of hot new device market segments like spine and orthobiologics. Take a look at the 5 yr stock performance and you will see what I mean.Some on their MB say its ripe for a split and will become more affordable. ZMH,a recent spinoff from BMY,is another fast growing performer anf their recent acquisition of CEP has doubled the size of the company to be in excess of $2B.

      I love your stories of the the West Coast and your historical past,after watching Ken Burn's Way West series last night(Thank Gawd its after "Sex in the City"), I am begining to relate to those historical gem bites you offer. In SF many times and in Marin County and Sacremento, but that about it. The Valley area sounds absoultely gorgeous. Keep it up!!


    • Web,

      looks like lattice (LSCC) will take a hit today. think its worth a little nibble, maybe tomorrow?


    • Ortho's posts are priceless in that they give a specialist's view of his area of expertise in a growing boomer market for his practice. If I weren't so wrapped up in NFI, I'd be listening to the names that he mentions...Stryker and so forth because they will not come under the political scrutiny of the pharmas and others in future elections. Gold in his thinking.

      Also, his stories are marvelous...stuffed Maytag-stuffed olives and all.

      He's been giving us these high-growth names all along. Anyone listen and act ?


    • Gang

      Contrary to popular wisdom I have learned more about the truth of markets from message boards than I have ever learned anywhere else. I am a life-long investor since 16.

      Actually, it's logical. Smart investors, professionals even, want to share information with others, using the power of the internet as a gathering mechanism. It is natural.

      The national media is all but worthless with the exception of Louis Ruckeyeser.

      The great investment boards are hunt and gather. People bring their expertise to discussion. I know enough to listen when someone really well-informed, experienced speaks. I am a student and will always be so. It is a strange manifestation of talk boards that brilliant investors gather to share ideas...all benefitting because one can discriminate between the best and others if one is patient. It is a point of optimism in the internet age.

      Of course, in a stock like ABT, the message board is a wonderful harbor of common interest, both financial and personal, and it is, in its own way, an investment treasure.


    • I wuv you too, Web


    • Spec and Lib are very serious investors... They enjoy a little OT... I know this... However, as serious investors, they have their limits and stops...

      I have no limits and stops... It is a burden, but it is my burden...


      PS... It makes me smile when you post Cel... I have known LS for nearly 3 years... She is a true friend... If anyone wants to hurt her, they will have to go through me... That is the case for most everyone on this board... If they attempt to go through me with rhetoric or threats, I assure you they will always lose...

    • Yes, I agree. The OT stuff is what attracted me to this board when I was trying to figure out what to do with my Abt stock. I've gained good ideas that's led to good decisions, and had fun with it too. It's a congenial bunch for the most part. Good jokes too. Why not have fun while working?

    • That's a good one, Plut! Hoping Spec and Lib come back and tell us all about their new company's prospects....catchy name!

    • Celerii, whether people will admit it or not, we are pretty much driven by Greed... It has many facets and levels...

      I really enjoy seeing a change in people... Most people are good at heart, and act like a$$holes for attention... So, I give it to them while most others will just ignore them...

      One of the derivatives of Greed is jealousy... For some reason, some people don't like it much when there are normal relationships on these boards... They don't like the OT stuff...

      In reality, if it were not for the OT stuff, why would anyone even consider a public message board for stock advice... That is idiotic...

      In Truth, when the OT dies, the Board dies... I have seen it time and time again...

      Hang in there Honey...


    • Celeri- I hear Spec & Lib bot both FEDEX & UPS in a merger forming a new company called FEDUP.Did you hear about the Irish bank robbers who after breaking into 4 Dublin safes found only a container of vanilla pudding.They ate it and left with a queasy stomach but full.Next day headlines of Irish Times:DUBLIN'S LARGEST SPERM BANK ROBBED!

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