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Mines Management, Inc. Message Board

  • dylantemple@rocketmail.com dylantemple Feb 11, 2013 5:57 PM Flag

    RE: Those Dobbs Dolls

    Albuquerque in February is a little dull so I had a little time to look into this Dobbs doll issue. It seems as though Glenn's Montana-based worshipers somehow got their hands on the 1978 limited edition that was produced for his first campaign for public office. You can spot one a mile away. If your eyesight isn't very good you can smell the off gassing from the now banned plastic that holds the air. That's right, it's a blow up doll. The most striking feature is the face, which blends the best features of both Nanci and Sluggo from the old comic strip. Glenn is holding a Bible in his left hand and a wad of cash in the right. Above the air valve that sits in the middle of his rear end you may still be able to make out the words "Proudly Made Outside Of The USA." These are now serious collector's items. In early 2012, before Glenn Dobbs lapsed into a coma, he was looking into a new venture to introduce an updated version. In fact, he formed four or five offshore companies and transferred a few million dollars from unsuspecting hedge fund clients to fund the startup. He and his pal, Senator Bob Menendez from New Jersey, took a fact finding trip to Phuket, Thailand, hoping to lay the groundwork for the construction of a new factory. They even rounded up a few hundred six year old boys and had them fill out job applications. Dobbs and Menendez were treated like royalty. According to informed sources, the new doll--ClaimJumper Glenn-- is actually the first in a new line of talking dog toys. Squeeze his belly and a grating voice squeaks the line "We will be breaking ground next August." Unlike the classic model, the face on this pooch pleaser does bear a striking resemblance to the MGN CEO. The bearskin chukka boots add a bit of class. Glenn's legendary sense of humor is expressed in the construction of the raised right hand, which is missing all but the middle finger. Oh, and the toy is anatomically correct, so there are no rough edges or appendages for Fido to chew off or ingest. If it ever hits the market, I would rate it a Strong Buy. Just remember to save your pennies...or MGN shares, which will soon be one in the same.

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