I want to subscribe to TsarPicks for infinity. I am willing to pay all my future premiums in cash in advance. I also agree to mandatory arbitration if I lose all my money. The Tsar is granted the right to name the arbitrator and any terms necessary to settle any arbitration. Where do I send my check?
pmlljl, you don't send a check. You drop one-hundred-dollar bills from the side of the elevated freeway (95) just above the park on the NW corner of 4th and Stewart. You do it from the passenger window while driving east. Agents below will arise from various depths of slumber to count carefully your deposit before forwarding it to Tsar. Be sure to shout your name from the window as you drop the money so that the proper account can be credited.
You didn't specify a city but I expect you mean Las Vegas, Nevada based on my limited knowledge of the interstate number and street names that you mentioned. In addition, you didn't mention the number of Benjamin's that are required. I am not surprised that you didn't mention a maximum, but I would have expected at least a minimum. Finally, I can't physically be driving the car and throwing the $100s from the passenger seat. Do you suggest that I find a homeless person to help me in this task? If so, should I have him/her drive or throw the Bennies? Life is just so complicated.
I am awaiting your advice in this urgent matter. I know the tsar is waiting for my payment and your remittal so that he can make the downpayment on his new Cessna personal jet.