I am not an animal enthusiast and I have no pets other than an occasional spider or housefly. However, I am partial to your support of the rights of animals to be investors. I think the stock exchanges should be forced to admit all animals to invest, not just bulls and bears. Please advise me about your polar bear's investment record and the strategies he employs. I may want to have him do some day-trading on the short side for me. I think it would be advisable to use a bear to do my shorting because it would take advantage of his natural instincts.