A woman brought a very limp duck into a veterinary clinic.
As she laid her pet on the table, the vet pulled out his stethoscope and listened to the bird's chest.
After a moment or two, he shook his head and said, "I'm very sorry, madam, but your duck has passed away."
The distressed woman cried out, "Are you sure?"
"Yes, I'm sure," the vet said confidently. "He's dead."
"But how can you be so sure?" she protested. "You haven't done any testing. Maybe he's just in a coma or something."
The vet rolled his eyes, turned around and left the room.
Moments later he returned with a cat. The cat jumped on the table and delicately sniffed the bird from head to foot, then sat back on its haunches, shook its head, meowed softly and strolled out of the room.
The vet followed the cat out and returned with a huge black Labrador Retriever. As the duck's owner looked on in amazement, the dog stood on his hind legs, put his front paws on the examining table and sniffed the duck from head to foot. The dog then looked up at the vet with sad eyes and shook his head.
The vet looked at the woman and said, "I'm sorry, lady, but your duck is 100% certifiably dead," then turned to his computer, punched in a few keys and produced a bill for $150, which he handed to the woman.
Still in shock, the lady looked at the bill and complained loudly, "You're charging me $150 just to tell me my duck is dead?"
The vet shrugged and said, "I'm sorry. If you'd taken my word for it in the first place, the bill would only have been $20, but with the additional Cat scan and Lab report, it's now $150."