Good day, CYTK Monkeys. This is a prerecorded briefing made prior to your departure and which for security reasons of the highest importance has been known on board during the mission only by your H-A-L 9000 computer. Now that you are in Jupiter's space, and the entire crew is revived, it can be told to you. Eighteen months ago, the first evidence of intelligent life off the Earth was discovered. It was buried forty feet below the lunar surface, near the crater Tycho. Except for a single, very powerful radio emission aimed at Jupiter the four million year old black monolith has remained completely inert, its origin and purpose still a total mystery.
I can't believe some stuff we have to read on CYTK message board these days... I wish there was an intelligent STOCK RELATED discussion here.
scointreau what the hell are you doing here?? You're supposed to be at Pope's funeral right now.
Hey, careful, don't knock weed. So far, medicinal marijuana has more points than any drug that has come out of this shop. I'm Hopefull for all of us that this will change, but for now, weed 1 cytk 0.
And Stanley? If you have absolutely nothing better to do, it's the thing to do.
Hold off for the good stuff bong, we may be smoking soon. And I mean the good stuff.
You have an enormous responsibility on this mission, in many ways perhaps the greatest responsibility of any single mission element. You're the brain, and central nervous system of the ship, and your responsibilities include watching over the men in hibernation. Does this ever cause you any lack of confidence?
Are you a HAL 9000 computer?
Did you become operational at the H.A.L. plant in Urbana, Illinois on the 12th of January 1992?
Was your instructor Mr. Langley?
Did he teach you to sing a song.
Can you sing it for me?
I'm afraid. I'm afraid, Dave. Dave, my mind is going. I can feel it. I can feel it. My mind is going. There is no question about it. I can feel it. I can feel it. I can feel it. I'm a... fraid.
This is going to be a long, long voyage HAL, Can you kindly put me back to sleep? Wake me up when we have real news.