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  • pjv2xyw9dww4b5 pjv2xyw9dww4b5 Dec 10, 2007 12:00 AM Flag

    lowest close for 2007

    Imagine how the share price will soar when ITIC announces a dividend increase for March, 2008: 6 cents PLUS 0.02 fresh penguins per share. (Be sure you have a whole multiple of 50 shares on the record date, by the way.) It should be easy since ITIC has had to purchase Antarctic real estate from policyholders filing claims.

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    • pj:

      I don't have my own personal polar bear.
      If I buy ITIC and get a penguin as a dividend, do I eat the penguin myself? Does it taste like chicken? Maybe I will just forward it to you. Are penguin dividends taxable?

      • 1 Reply to pmlljl
      • pmlljl,
        It is only because ITIC has had to purchase Antarctic real estate from disgruntled policyholders that we can look forward to penguin dividends. Here are some of your options:

        * Hold your shares in an IRA. You don't have to begin withdrawing penguins until the year you turn 59.5. Finding a custodian for such an IRA can be a bit difficult.

        * Hold your shares in a taxable account. The tax on a dividend paid in penguins must be paid in like kind. Be sure to send any estimated payments made in penguins to the Antarctic Payment Center of the IRS. Warnings: (1) I know of no charities that take penguins as contributions. (2) Eating the penguin dividends and denying to the IRS that you ever got them constitutes tax evasion. They'll catch you when the auditor smells penguin on your breath.

        * Hold your shares in a penguin dividend reinvestment program. Your penguins will be reinvested in ITIC shares. You'll still have to pay taxes on the dividends--in penguins, of course--so you'll be buying penguins from a bird broker to meet this obligation.

        Just wait until ITIC is buying Amazon jungle real estate from disgruntled policyholders. No telling what kind of dividends we'll get.

97.02+1.18(+1.23%)Oct 26 4:00 PMEDT