I wented down to Billy Bob watering hole lass nite to watch tha debait cuz thay got themselfs a big ole 19" culler tellyvishun set. Well let me told you I juss asoon goed home. That thar Rom Knee spanked him up won side an down tha odder. It was a skoolin like I aint never scene! My hearrow Burr Rock cood knot even wook ole Rom Knee in the eye. Him juss keeped lookin down or at tha klueless commintaytour wen Rom Knee was speekin as ifen to sey help me git outta this hear kuandree. I tell ya Burr Rock best pix hisself up by tha boot straps an show up fur tha nex debait. I aint got know faith in that redneck Jo Byden. I got myseff a feeling Paul Ryin is a gunna kix him sum #$%$. This aint lookin good my democradic frens. This juss aint lookin good at all.
All those in fayver of God say yah. All those appost to God say no. Ifen you asked me tha nos had it. But God won out dag bernit an we God apposing demmykrats boo'd reel loud cuss of it. Yeee Haaa.
Lass nite I had Paw take down the Crissmiss deckorashuns an put up tha antena sew I cood watch me sum Burrock Hoosane Obomba on tha tellyvisin. I loss my job tha year he gotted electid an aint seen a days werk since. All my frens an rellytives unemployd now too. Aint no one highering. We haff loosed evryting. All the cumpennys an factorys done closed thar doors. We aint even got us a mall no moore since Burrock tooked office. But aftur lass nite wen he sed "Amarryka, change takes time" I have me renude hope! Now I no he furgot to ad the werds "takes time" to his slowgan back in 2008 but it due knot madder no moore. He saided a new werd "Fourwerd" now I motivatid all tha biznisses an factorys an mall gunna opin back up an all my frens and rellytiffs an me all gonna git are jobs back! His new messige is awesum! I'm gunna git me sum free hellth care to boot! I bet evrybuddy beleaf him agin specially tha milluns of unemployd dat loss thar job while he wuz pressydit.
I am imbearissed two call dat fool of a boy elike my sun. Ifen i haddint ben thar fur tha burth I wood sware he awuzin tha off spring of uncull cleetus an tha banjoe boy. Elike had hisself a job innerview as tha isle cleen up boy at tha lowcull Piggly Wiggly. Wen he cummed out of his room dressed in tha close he intendid to ware thay wuz all durdy an rumpulled. I new thay wuz needin a washin befur he leafed sew I toll him to take his pants an jacket off an you wont beleaf what he did!
Dis hear remine me of me an my boy elike sep he aint nebber scene hisself no boobies an elike ugly an he kant read or play futball an dont no gurl like him.
Boy aint you tha won dat called ole Johnnys dawdur a no good 2 bit harrywin shootin hore den announse she OD? Now yurra tryna play belly stix wit him? Wats tha madder wit you boy? We all knowed yur a few sheep short of a orgee but why you got to prove dat dey in an dey out up in hear? Yur moore fool den my boy elike an dat seyin sumtin boy cuz he aint got all tha dots on his dyce dat fur dam shure. Now git yur brown stayned nose outta wear it dont belong, grab a shuvil an go joyne elike in tha back yard.
Boy aint nobuddy miss you on dis bord.
You furgitted to tellem you sole dem ebait chers to yur fool pappy an we all no hims about as slow as a snale crossin super glue.
Now git yurseff off tha cumpudder an go diggin fur oil in tha back yard.
Well I'll be derned. This hear bord dun falled to peaces wen my boy leff. May be he wuz tha reel ring leeder aftur all. I dont evin sea no cryin posts frum dat fella, wats his dern name? agqut? He was like a turd dat woodint flush, dat won wuz.
Ewike soled all his chers in dis hear peace of sheet of a cumpenny. Tha funny part is he sole em rite befur it wented up fur tha furst time in all them yers he ben holdin. ROFLMAO. fool iddyit. Lass I seen him he was leenin over tha town brige. I drived him thar persunally. Aint ben home cinse. good by an good ridens to him an all yous.
I juss wading fur dat lieing boy of mine to cum tell yall tha storee bout his preten googull inbessmint. he haw he haw. Dat won allways did git me an his pappy slappin our neez. Furst time I reeded dat whopurr I laffed sew hard my dentures falled rite outta my mowth. Due dat boy reely tink you folks fool enuff to beleaf he spen 24/7 on dis hear bord spittin fire defendind ebait penny stok wen he owned a $550 stok? Aint it kinda funny he dont never spend no time on googull bord braggin wat a savvy cher holer he tink he is insted? I sware ifen you stan close nuff to dat boy you cood here tha sea.
Did you furgit to pay yur brane bill agin boy? Juss cuss ya see green fur wonce dont meened you maked munny. Dat like tha tyme you ask me how you ken be outta munny when ya still had chex leff.
You byed dis hear stok at $50 dollers fool. Go git yurseff a peace of paypurr and due tha math. I sware thay shood put yur pitcher on tha front of a trowgin box. Yur tha poster boy fur birth cuntroll ifen I ever knowed won.
Boy you coodnt poor wadder outta boot ifen tha instrukshuns were on tha heel. You byed dis hear stok at $50 an it aint ben much pass $30 since. Can you add boy? Yur loosing munny. I sware yur nummer den a frozin mukluk. Cummin on hear a pumpin ebait like they magikilly gonna disloge frum tha bottum of tha bay. Tha day dat happin is tha day dat thar mullit you sport cums bak in style. ebait old news! Hellow?
Thar aint no due overs in tha stok markit boy. Yur a looser plane an simpull. Now why dont you git on outta hear. yur deprivin sum villige of thar idyit.
Boy you bena pumpin dis hear stox fur sicks long yers tryin to git inocent folk to clime abord tha titanic with you. Now its purdy cleer to me an yur Paw dat you aint got no grane in tha sighlow but why you got to go tarnishin tha Huckcallberry familee name with yur fool inbessmint inna has ben of a cumpenny ebait? Ifen I didnt no eny bedder I sey yur livin proof evalewshun goes in reverse. Its time fur you to git a traler of yur own prefurably in anodder state. Yur a 44 yer ole vergin red nex anna imbearismint to tha fine state of Kentuckee. Befur you go an git you kneed to apollyjize fur all tha relentless pumpin you did. It falled on deff ears cuz nobody as gullabull as you boy but these hear folks had to lissin to you blow yur hot breth you bag holdin fool. Now tellum yur sorry, pak yur sheet an make like a tree an take a long walk offa short peer. Watch that Suly cum along an sey dis hear post dont make no cents. I sware that boys a half a bubble short of plum. It aint no wunder he tryed to emale my boy fur a git togedder.
Evry buddy knowed dat you koodint hit tha floor ifen you falled on it sew why you tryin to hit in tha stox markit? Yurn a inbarrassmint to hour fine famlee name pickin ebait as yur stox of choice. Why its a fallin faster than a pairalyzed mud hen in a hail storm. Yur tha onlee numnut dats still a holdin on cept fur dat fool fren of yurs dat gotted you in dis hear mess to begin with. Wat wus his name? Sickhero? Dat baffoon wuz about as slow as a snale crossin super glew. Wat name he pumpin wit on dis hear bord now? Wats it a gonna take fur you to cell dem ebait chers boy?
Boy did you fall out of tha stewpid tree an hit evry brandch on tha way down? I cummed hear to haff a few laffs at yur xpense. It aint hard two due. I juss telled tha trewth sew evrywon knowed wat I got to put up with dey in an dey out an how you made dis fool inbestmint in a cumpenny dat runnin on 3 sillenders. Now go due yur chwhores boy an stop hangin on dis hear bord 24/7 fur 5 long yers.
Boy you still tryin to figger out wat evrybuddys posts meen? Yur elevater dont go all tha way to tha top floor now do it. Daggone idyit is wat you are boy.
Thar she blows like a f a r t in a winstorm. Yall longs lissen up! You ben eatin soup with a fork long enuff. Elikes maw about to giv you sum soun advice. Dis hear ebait is wat thay call a short stox. My sun elike tryed to cunvince me dat hims fool inbestmint wuzza gunna make us richer den duck liver. Dat wus moore den 5 yers ago an he still aint broked eben! Now ifen he'd a gone short we'd dun moved on out of dis traler in tha back woods of kentuckee an into a cabin with indoor pumming long a go. My boy ben playin hockee with a warped stix fur yers. Wat is yur excuse ya daggone long dig bats? Have ya lost contax with tha muthership? Now git on tha fone with dat fool broakher of yers an tell em you'd cum out of yur comma an gonna cell tha bags to enywon willin to hold em.
Good Mornin thar D Mad. My sun elike dun toll me a lot about you. Him saided you was tha smardist postur on this hear bord. Him saided he got in two a fite with you an saided sum meen tings all in tha name of gelisy. My boy elike cryed hisself to sweep tinking about wat a fool him made of hisself with you. Him saided evry won hear gelis of you specilly dat white trash red nex unedgeamakatid skum bag low life pig agqut. Them thar his werds knot mine. He saided agqut frum tha back hills of Pensylveina an gelis of enybuddy dat wented pass tha fiveth grade. Tellin evrywon tha most impordent ting in life is wat you lern in mens prisin cell and on a boat in tha icy sees fur months on end wit all men or a muddy fox hole in Nom wit all men an knot skool an enybuddy dat go to skool dum. ROFLMAO! Ken you say justifikashun fur a lower edumakashun? I wood luv to meet this agqut. He sounds like a reel peace of werk dat got hisself two much yardage between goal posts. Worser den my boy elike an we all no him a few bradys short of a bunch. Enyways I wantid to tell you elike to daggoone imbarrised to show his face on dis hear bord since he made a fool of hisself with you an ebait and lowered hisself by makin frens with banjoe pickin agqut tha inbread.
Yur a dern fool juss like my boy elike saided. elike sed yur desprite fur attenshun but it purdy daggone sad you ben a chexin yur emale evry day fur an intire weak a weighten on a awkshun numbar. That thar is purdy hard up an desprite ifen you ask me. Why dont you git on out an make yurseff sum frens insted of a beggin fur an akshun numbar fur axshun? Sounds like yur a few hammers short of a hardwear store boy.