Shy? Stand Out Anyway

• Adelia Cellini Linecker
• On 6:02 pm EST, Wednesday November 4, 2009

How do shy people achieve business success widely associated with extroverts? By quietly applying their strengths and boosting their visibility. Nancy Ancowitz, author of "Self-Promotion for Introverts: The Quiet Guide to Getting Ahead," says the key is to be true to yourself -- avoid trying to be an extrovert as you learn to showcase your talents.

"Working a room like a chatterbox won't work for introverts," she told IBD. "It's better to concentrate on a few meaningful conversations."

Listen. Reduce jitters at social events by hearing what others say and asking thoughtful questions.

Watch. Concentrate while others talk. "For some people, making eye contact is difficult, so it's also OK to look in the general direction of the eyes, maybe the eyebrows," Ancowitz said.

Prepare. Go to meetings with a few ideas of what you can talk about. This helps you gain recognition for making valuable contributions, Ancowitz says. "An extrovert is confident thinking out loud and can just pick up on something in the moment and talk about it," she said. "An introvert needs to think about things before talking about them because they are more concerned with saying the perfect thing."

Practice. Be aware of your body language -- how you use your hands, if you nod too much. Hone your communication skills so you can speak as clearly and confidently as you write. If you want to be taken seriously, avoid constructions such as "I'm not sure this is relevant, but ... ," writes Linda Tarr-Whelan, author of "Women Lead the Way." "Being direct and forthright does not mean being rude."

Focus. Know your audience. Whether it's a meeting with a few people or a large networking event, zero in on issues and think of ways you can solve problems. "The only way to promote yourself successfully is to figure out what they need and what you have," Ancowitz said.

Believe. Don't shortchange yourself. Show confidence in your skills.

For instance, you want a raise. Ask for what you want, highlighting your skills and job performance.

Stop talking to let the other person respond. And never break the silence by "offering a laundry list of reasons why you need a raise or a promotion or whatever it is you are requesting," Marianna Olszewski wrote in "A Woman's Guide to Financial Freedom," adding: "As hard as it is to believe, most bosses usually do not care. Once you start explaining, you have lost before you have even begun."

Clarify. In meetings and interviews, say what you want and what you can offer, Ancowitz says.

Be specific about the knowledge, experience, market intelligence and connections you can offer.

Follow through. After making the colossal effort to network with a bunch of people you don't know, don't make your effort go to waste.

"For introverts, this part can actually be easy because we tend to be comfortable with our keyboards," Ancowitz said.

Soon after meeting a person, write a note about one thing you have in common on the back of her business card. Then send her an e-mail saying how nice it was to meet her.

Be realistic. Don't take it personally when you don't receive a response to your e-mail and phone calls. "Know that most people are overwhelmed with too much input," Ancowitz said.

Be persistent, but also decide when you should spend more energy generating other leads, Ancowitz says.

Buzz up!