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How to Make New Friends in Retirement

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It can be difficult to maintain or grow your network of friends when you retire. Once you leave the working world, you no longer have regular access to the co-workers you shared significant life moments with. Outside of the job you may discover you have few shared interests. And if you no longer meet on the worksite each day, it is not always easy to make time to get together. Retirement affords the perfect opportunity to spend time with those you enjoy. Unfortunately, it probably won't be effortless to fill your social calendar with interesting and fun people.

Before the end of the year, my wife and I are moving to a new area where we hope to spend our retirement years. We are leaving behind friends and neighbors who have been part of our lives for decades. Although we are moving less than 100 miles away, we will no longer be within walking distance from our conglomeration of acquaintances that we share stories and spend time with. It is a bit scary to start all over, especially at our age. Without the likelihood of meeting people on the job and with our children long out of school, we will be on our own to get to know the locals.

Our fears are somewhat allayed thanks to a couple we met while dining at a local restaurant. Sitting at the table next to us, they were having a great time. Before we knew it, we were swapping stories. We found ourselves taking mental notes at their mention of the best restaurants to visit and intriguing activities to engage in. Their friendly advice and warm interaction not only made my wife and I feel more comfortable with our decision to move, but actually excited about getting situated as soon as possible.

We are both outgoing to some extent. I worked in sales for 30 years, so I am used to and enjoy engaging with others. My wife has a natural warmth and genuine interest in others that quickly endears her to those she meets. We realize we have a better chance of meeting people if we make the effort to do so. When we pass someone on the street we are friendly and greet them. After seeing the same face a few times we can more easily pause and strike up a conversation. The great thing about where we are retiring is people in general seem friendly and positive. Maybe it is the numerous wine tasting rooms in the vicinity that bring down barriers and help keep everyone smiling.

Another avenue we plan to explore in our efforts to meet people is volunteering and getting engaged with the community. We want to do something worthwhile to contribute to our new community. A short list of possibilities include volunteering at the local hospital, joining a French speaking group, contributing time to local political issues or perhaps volunteering as a docent at a local museum, coastal park or historical site. Becoming involved in local organizations and causes will be an excellent way to meet like-minded folks in the area while doing something that we enjoy and matters.

Common interests or hobbies is another way to meet people. My aunt loves to square dance and has met many people as part of a traveling dance group. It is great exercise and brings together wonderful people doing what they enjoy. My dad is a dedicated fly fisherman, so he joined the local chapter of American Fly Fishermen. The group meets once a month for lunch where a guest speaker enlightens them about the latest fly tying technique or superb fishing spot. I am looking forward to growing a vegetable garden when we arrive. Hopefully there is a local group with similar interests that I can attach myself to. If you have a passion, there are likely others with similar inclinations. You just have to find them.

Although it is not always easy to meet new people after retirement, it is not impossible. As you try new things and explore the local scene, you will cross paths with all kinds of people. Don't be afraid to share your passions and interests. If you are willing to put yourself out there and make the effort, you might uncover your next best friend to be.

Dave Bernard blogs at Retirement-Only The Beginning.



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