The term 'bridezilla' gets thrown around liberally these days. As a bridal stylist, I get asked on a consistent basis about brides and the monsters they are possessed by in the months following their engagement. Most girls never set out to be a bridezilla, and some definitely maintain their chill-bride demeanor. Unfortunately, some do fall into the trap that stress and expectation builds around them. Read on to discover how to avoid these bridezilla pitfalls!
Be open, yet decisive.
As women, we often worry that being decisive will translate into being perceived as bossy or aggressive. Therefore many brides struggle with voicing their opinions and decisions and instead express that they're 'flexible'. Always flexible, and never with a specific answer. Nothing is more frustrating for those around you trying to help you plan a wedding than to never get a straight answer or choice from you. It is important to recognize that although you can be open to many different options, styles, and choices, and that, unfortunately, you cannot control everything, if you feel strongly about a decision- voice your feelings. It's your wedding and it's important that you feel in control. It will allow your relationships to remain strong and avoid any feelings of resentment later on.
Remember your WHY
This goes along with remaining present in the wedding process, as its always easier to remain calm and content when you are connected to the bigger picture! As you're going through your wedding planning process and hurdles come up, remember the reason why you're doing this. Chances are, you're crazy about your fiancé and can't wait to commit to this person for the rest of your life in front of all of your loved ones. Hold on to that excitement and joy and the rest won't seem as daunting.
The magic words, as most would agree, are please and thank you. You will be surrounded by those who just want to help you create a special day, and when they do, try to use these words often and be genuine about it. Remember to be nice, because, by definition, bridezilla's are not nice.
Vent in a healthy way
I can guarantee that it will not be smooth sailing the entire way through. Family members will weigh in, caterers may cancel and dress alterations may prove more difficult than you thought. It's definitely okay to vent and express yourself, just be sure to do it in a healthy way. Unloading all of your distress onto your bridesmaid may make her feel unappreciated and more like a punching bag than a partner. Make sure that you don't use accusatory language when venting and you don't make broad sweeping statements: i.e. "Everything is going wrong," or "No one cares about my wedding," and "This is supposed to be MY day."
Remember that there's life outside the wedding
Finally, its important to remember that life is still going on outside of your wedding. Although it will feel like this is the biggest thing ever to happen (because for you, it might be!) but you still have responsibilities outside of being a bride. So, next time you're on the phone with your bridesmaids and you've exhausted all wedding topics, don't forget to ask them how they are and properly catch up with them. Even though you feel like you don't have a spare moment in your schedule, there's always enough time to shoot someone a text just to remind them that the wedding hasn't completely claimed your sanity.
This should be first and foremost, because happy people just don't turn into bridezillas, its a fact. Happy planning!
Style Me Pretty Contributor - Goli Parvinian is a bridal enthusiast and masters student living in Melbourne, Australia. Over the past few years, she has worked for bridal brands in her hometown of Chicago, New Zealand and New York City. You can typically find her in a cafe, face-timing her nieces or out on a long run.