Dear old Pudsey Bear and his celebrity pals seized control of the BBC schedules on Friday evening for Children In Need’s 2019 telethon, aiming to raise more than last year’s £50.6m to help disadvantaged children in the UK.
We watched both the star-studded entertainment exclusives and the eye-dampening appeal VTs (and tolerated the technical glitches) so you didn’t have to. Here are the bandaged bear's best bits from five hours of charitable programming…
Doctor Who fan got early Christmas present
An irresistibly feelgood moment saw one young Whovian got her festive treat early. Young Anastasia has suffered with mental health issues but found solace, fun and friendship at East London’s Hackney Shed drama club, an inclusive initiative funded by Children In Need.
Anastasia’s other big love is Doctor Who, which she watches every day. So she was thrilled when the 13th Doctor, Jodie Whittaker, along with companions Yaz (Mandip Gill) and Ryan (Tosin Cole), appeared on-screen with a special message for her, explaining how they were busy filming in America for the upcoming 12th series.
With the aid of Timelord technology, though, the timey-wimey trio promptly materialised in the studio and shy Anastasia’s squeal of sheer joy was joyous to behold. When Whittaker hugged her and presented the beaming-but-tearful superfan with her very own sonic screwdriver, it was a magical moment. Not just poignant proof of why the time was right for a female Doctor but a reminder of TV’s ability to comfort, inspire and transport us to other worlds.
You won’t see anything better on TV all weekend than the reaction of that fabulous girl to the cast of Doctor Who on Children In Need. Brilliant from both Jodie Whittaker & Tess Daly.— Mark Rowntree (@uptheirons007) November 15, 2019
Tiff ’n’ Kev were worthy Strictly winners
As ballroom barman Craig Revel Horwood said with scenery-chewing relish: “Get outta my pub, dahlings!” Ahead of this weekend’s Strictly seaside edition from Blackpool Tower Ballroom, we got a pint-sized sparkly special as four EastEnders actors swapped the Queen Vic for the dancefloor to compete for the Pudsey Glitterball Trophy.
Ricky “Stuart” Champ, Louisa “Ruby” Lytton, Maisie “Tiffany” Smith and Rudolph “Patrick” Walker OBE were paired with Strictly pros for a group cha cha cha. Happily, the standard of hoofing was surprisingly high.
At 80, Walker became the oldest male to ever take to the Strictly ballroom and his hip action belied his years. Cha-cha-Champ got his groove on, while Lytton had a slight head start, having finished fourth in Strictly proper, albeit 13 years ago.
The deserving winner, though, was 18-year-old Maisie Smith whose moves were fast, flirty and captured the dance’s Cuban flavour. She was paired with pro Kevin Clifton, current holder of the main glitterball with partner Stacey Dooley. Kev from Grimsby now has two Strictly trophies in his cabinet – some small consolation for his early exit in the current series alongside Anneka Rice. Get outta my contest!
Please Please Please can we have @maisie_smith_ and @keviclifton to take part in #Strictly next year �� they absolutely smashed Strictly in the Eastenders special tonight. ��#ChildrenInNeed I think they will definitely win the whole series if they do. ���� #BBCiN— ��Carly�� (@Carz_Carz) November 15, 2019
how amazing were the Eastenders cast in the Strictly children in need special����...incredibly talented people, massive well done @maisie_smith_@louisalytton@RickyChamp1@RudolphWalkerDA very proud����❤️ #ChildrensDay2019pic.twitter.com/SWkF0vEEPs— c͏h͏e͏l͏s͏ea☆ (@TillyKArmy) November 15, 2019
Star Wars came over all Top Gear to cute effect
The BBC obviously got limited access to the secretive Disney sci-fi franchise but still concocted a sweet little segment from what little they had.
It was reminiscent of a Clarkson-era Top Gear stunt as Star Wars stars Daisy Ridley and John Boyega challenged YouTuber Colin Furze to build a working X-34 Landspeeder, helped by young Jedis from Children In Need projects.
Having completed work only this morning, Furze drove the finished vehicle – based on a golf buggy – into the studio. It’s already up for auction on Ebay with all proceeds going to Darth Pudsey. May the fundraising force be with you.
Dragon’s Den dinner party fell flat
“The fun doesn’t stop during the Ten O’Clock News, when over on BBC Two, the Dragons from Dragons’ Den dine out at the I’ll Get This restaurant.” So said the publicity material. Except, well, the fun did stop.
Peter Jones, Tej Lalvani, Touker Suleyman, Sara Davies and Sarah Willingham gathered for a deeply awkward meal full of stilted chat and dull droning. They played parlour games. They pretended to be human and like each other. Jones and Willingham were the only two you’d remotely countenance spending an evening with in real life.
Most excruciatingly of all, they rounded off proceedings by donating £5,000 apiece (small change for these millionaires) and smugly high-fiving about what great philanthropists they were. A rare misjudged piece of Children In Need programming.
If all the Dragons from Dragon's Den gave 1% of their total net worth each to #ChildrenInNeed they would probably out-fundraise the entire country. Peter Jones is worth half a billion alone.— Professional knob jockey (@getlostscott) November 15, 2019
Worst #ChildrenInNeed in years. This Dragon's Den thing is an abomination. The best part was Nick Knowles speech and he was getting interupted every second.— Emma Dale (@Emma__Dale) November 15, 2019
Musical performances were patchy
The night was awash with musical numbers. Some worked OK, others less so.
The hits? The 1400-strong Children in Need Choir singing “True Colours” live up and down the country; a typically efficient weepy ballad from reformed Irish boy band Westlife; and actor Adrian Lester and beatboxing pals doing an acapella rendition of Stevie Wonder’s “I Wish” from Children In Need's Got It Covered album.
The misses? A weedy song-and-dance number from Big The Musical, which didn’t deserve to open the show; Michael Ball and Alfie Boe singing Labi Siffre’s apartheid anthem “Something Inside So Strong” with occasional lapses into cod-Afro Caribbean accents; and One Direction alumnus Louis Tomlinson, who seemed to have gone all Mockney despite hailing from Doncaster, then thanked the studio audience with that insufferable faux-humble praying hands gesture. It's a no from us, Louis.
Anyone else find Michael Ball and Alfie Boe singing ‘something inside so strong’ like really awkward, two middle aged white guys singing a song written about apartheid...— Jamesy (@jamesydraws) November 15, 2019
Crackerjack made a misty-eyed comeback
“It’s Friday, it’s nearly 8pm… it’s Crackerjack.” So shouted CBBC presenters Sam and Mark (aka the Poundstretcher Ant and Dec), introducing a segment teasing the long-awaited return of Crackerjack! to the BBC in January.
We saw a vintage clip of Trevor Basham, who appeared on the show aged 10 (presented by Stu “ooh I could crush a grape” Francis), before he played a chaotic live game in the studio against his son Harry. Naturally, child beat parent, so Trevor wound up covered in custard pie and wearing two tutus (see what they did there?). The pair were then presented with giant Crackerjack pencils.
The raucous gameshow was a children’s TV staple for three decades but last aired 35 years ago. This one-off mini return might have been nostalgic but didn’t quite whet the appetite for its return. Perhaps some shows are best left in the archives. Don't get your knickers in a knot.
Can’t believe Crackerjack is coming back ! It was on on Fridays when I was a kid and my mum actually allowed me to eat in front of the tv specially ( she brought a table in , I wasn’t allowed to eat off my knee ��) #ChildrenInNeed2019— D e b r a (@Debjaykay) November 15, 2019
Three Lions surprised amputee footballers
One of the night’s early segments saw children from the Amputee Football Association get a sweet surprise when the England strikeforce of Harry Kane, Marcus Rashford and Raheem Sterling joined them for a training session. Along with presenter Mark Wright, the Premier League trio played on crutches, just like the kids. Not easy but possibly a handy skill to have for when they get injured.
Millionaire professional footballers often get a bad press – something Sterling in particular has suffered – but scenes such as this demonstrate what decent young men and fine role models they are. Well played.