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Everything You Need to Know About Dating a Cancer Man

Everything You Need to Know About Dating a Cancer Man

Astrology can help us understand more about ourselves and the people we love/date/hopelessly crush on—no matter their gender. For more deets on Cancer compatibility, check out our guide to dating a Cancer woman and our gender-neutral guide to dating a Cancer.


There are just a few basics that need to be explored when you first start dating someone. Where is he from? What does he do for a living? Oh, and most definitely, when’s his birthday? This isn’t just for remembering when to send that “happy b-day :)” text! Knowing a potential boo’s zodiac sign can really help in understanding his behavior. Astrology helps us break down personality traits, pet peeves, and, yes, even dating patterns. It can be fun and informative to look up his sign and see how yours works with his. (Yes, we’re talking compatibility!)

If you’re dating, Insta sleuthing (hi, guilty), or just fantasizing over a Cancer man, there sure is a lot to know. These crabby crabs are sensitive, sweet, and maybe just a lil bit clingy…hope you like snuggles!

Luckily, astrology allows us to decipher personality traits, pet peeves, and so much more. And trust me when I say there is sooo much more to a Cancer man than you initially realized. So if your guy was born between June 21 and July 22, look no further! Behold, the comprehensive guide to navigating him.

The Cancer basics

Birthday: June 21 to July 22

Modality: Cardinal sign

Element: Water sign

Ruling planet: The Moon

Represented by: The Crab

Keywords: Emotional, nurturing, protective, intuitive, sentimental, sweet, sensitive, romantic, needy, grumpy, homey, moody, shy

Best traits: Caring, sensitive, empathetic, sweet, nurturing, committed, romantic

Worst traits: Clingy, needy, passive-aggressive, stuck in their ways

Love anthem: “Shallow,” from A Star Is Born

Watch this romance movie together: 13 Going on 30 (2003), directed by Gary Winick

Famous Cancer men: Daniel Radcliffe, Tom Hanks, Jaden Smith, Post Malone, Nick Offerman, Milo Ventimiglia, Jacob Elordi, Chris Pratt, Will Ferrell, Tom Cruise, Elon Musk, Kevin Hart, Kevin Bacon, Luke Bryan, Vin Diesel, Harrison Ford, Forest Whitaker, Benedict Cumberbatch, Sir Patrick Stewart, Post Malone, Larry David, Nick Offerman, Angus Cloud

Best day to ask him out: Monday

A Cancer man's best traits

One thing you can say about Cancer: He's in touch with his feelings. Seriously, he's one of the most sensitive, caring people you'll ever meet. He's cuddly, romantic, and wants to commit and probably even have a family. You do not need to worry about "playing it cool" with Cancer!

A Cancer man's worst traits

If you're not feeling Cancer's romantic nature, it's likely you'll find him kinda clingy. Like, he means well, but sometimes you just need your own space, you know? Also, Cancer tends to be a homebody...which can be great, but it also means that if you want to go to that bar crawl your friend is planning, he'd probably rather stay home. Finally, confrontation isn't his strong suit, which means he can be a bit passive-aggressive.

The best matches for a Cancer man

When it comes to a perfect match for Cancer, Scorpio easily takes the cake. The two water signs share emotional compatibility and similar values about security, trust, and commitment. Likewise, Cancer vibes with water sign Pisces—the fish and the crab both have ~oceans of emotions~.

Taurus is another great match for Cancer—both are slow-moving and loyal, and they love to get comfy and cozy. The Moon’s fave sign is Cancer, but its second fave is Taurus, so they share that ~lunar connection~ as well. Earth sign Virgo also makes a great partner—hardworking Virgos will prioritize their relationship and fully show up, unlike certain fire signs (see! below!). Finally, Cancer has opposites-attract astrological chemistry with Capricorn, its literal opposite on the zodiac. Hot!

Of course, fellow Cancers are also a great match for Cancer. They just get each other, y’know? And you just know that joint b-day dinner party will have the most delicious food you’ve ever eaten, the most beautiful mood lighting you’ve ever seen, and the comfiest chairs you’ve ever sat in. Invite me, pls?

The worst matches for a Cancer man

Cancers will need to compromise when connecting with Gemini or Aquarius. Cancers tend to be introverted and they like stability, and Gemmys are super social and unpredictable. These contrasting traits could make a Gemini feel restless and a Cancer feel stressed. Similarly, Aquarians think with their head, not their heart—the opposite of emotional Cancer.

Impulsive Sagittarius can also seem flaky to homebody Cancer. Likewise, Cancer can clash with extra-extroverted Leo—Cancer would rather Netflix and chill while Leo wants to hit up six different parties in one night. Exhausting!

But as with all signs, a little bit of conscious teamwork can create a healthy and loving partnership. If Cancer is cool with a chill night solo while Leo goes out with friends, this pairing can really work—and the same goes for all these other pairings. And remember, your Sun sign is only one part of your birth chart. If your Sun signs aren’t particularly compatible, your Moon, Mars, or Venus sign might be!

Sex with a Cancer Man

Let’s just say sex with a Cancer will always feel like an intimate affair. Their intuitive nature makes for a satisfying time between the sheets. They’re naturally romantic—think massages, prolonged eye contact, hour-long make-out sessions, and, sure, even rose petals. They’re so ~connected~ to you that they can basically read your mind. Cancers are the cuddliest people you’ll ever date. They’ll spoon you literally all night, so hope you don’t mind a little extra body heat in the summer.

Cancer men find enjoyment in fulfilling your every desire, thanks to their extreme sensuality and giving nature. Yep, they’re excellent at oral. There’s a reason their sign’s symbol looks like a 69! They also love to hear how great they are in bed, how hot they look, how sweet they are, etc.—basically don’t skimp on the compliments. Just know that if you want to mix things up in bed, you’ll have to explicitly tell him, since Cancers can be a bit shy if not encouraged.

The Perfect Date with a Cancer Man

No need for skydiving here!! As one of the most sensitive signs of the zodiac, a Cancer man wants to spend your date truly getting to know you. Expect to sip fancy cocktails while talking for hours at a bar with perfect mood lighting, or to gaze into each other’s eyes while going through those viral “36 Questions to Find Love.”

As the zodiac sign represented by the crab, Cancers naturally love the water. A beach date is pretty much their perfect date, and they wouldn't say no to a hot tub, either. Cozy Cancers are natural homebodies, so yeah, they’re always down to Netflix and chill.

A Relationship With a Cancer Man

Cancer wants to fast-forward through the "talking stage" and get straight to committed. They really thrive when they can be coupled up with a partner and know that their feelings are reciprocated. They're dependable, committed, and willing to put in the work. However, they're not always open to other POVs, and their homebody nature makes them reluctant to change.

A Cancer Man in Love

Cancer is one of the most romantic signs of the zodiac when they're in love. Cuddles, roses, poetry...you get the picture. Cancer will give you all the attention. Hopefully you feel the same way and the two of you can enjoy being loved-up together.

A Cancer Man at Home

Um, where did your Cancer man buy his mattress? Some how this dude has the comfiest bed, the coziest blankets, the most luxurious couch, and the fluffiest pillows you’ve ever encountered. While his home isn’t ostentatiously decorated like a Leo’s, he takes pride in having carefully chosen objects with a lot of sentimental value.

Expect to see plenty of framed photos of his family, items he’s been given or inherited from his grandparents, and souvenirs from travels. (Seriously, does everything in a Cancer man’s home have a nostalgic story behind it???) Even if he isn’t furnishing his studio in heirlooms, expect a Cancer man to pick a vintage piece over a trendy modern item any day.

A Cancer Man at the Office

Cancers are the reliable coworkers you turn to in a crisis. They might be a bit grouchy at times, but they’re always there for you when you need them. They’re also incredibly loyal, so if you help them out, they’ll always have your back. Although they can be shy and reserved, Cancers are also extremely intuitive and perceptive, which means they understand how people work. Oh, and they’re also creative, so yeah, they’ve got some excellent ideas. Who doesn’t want one of these watery geniuses as a coworker?

A Cancer Man with Friends

Expect a Cancer man to have a close circle of besties he’s known forever, not a huge social net of acquaintances. Quality over quantity, people!!! Cancers take their friendships seriously. They’re both loyal and nostalgic, so don’t be surprised if he’s still close with people he met in kindergarten (go ahead, ask them to show you some pics). While a Cancer *can* go out in a large group, he really shines one-on-one or in small groups. If you really want to get to know how he acts with his BFFs, plan a dinner party or a game night and not a bar crawl.

A Gift for a Cancer Man

Don’t worry about saving up for the latest iPhone. A Cancer man wants a gift from the HEART. Write him a poem about how much you love him! Bake him his favorite cookies! Create a scavenger hunt that shows him how well you know every detail about his life!

Okay, it doesn’t have to be that mushy-gushy, but Cancers appreciate it when you put some thought into their b-day gift. Think of this as an opportunity to show him that you really know him. It could be picking out his favorite bottle of wine, buying him that book he mentioned wanting to read, or planning a romantic weekend getaway for the two of you. There’s nothing a Cancer wants more than some QT with his cutie!!!

All about Cancer

As the first water sign of the zodiac, Cancer is intuitive and sensitive, and as a cardinal sign, he’s motivated to make intimate emotional connections that promise to last. At first, this shy guy probably can’t even look your way without blushing and turning away. He’s prone to overthinking things and might not be able to approach you, but if you make the first move, he’ll hold on tight and do anything for you. Cancer is incredibly nurturing, committed, and protective of his loved ones and does everything in his power to make sure you’re comfortable and feel safe with him.

Sometimes, Cancer men can come off as distant or sarcastic, but this is only a result of constantly feeling like they have to conceal their true emotions in society. This outward identity hides a man who is affectionate, gentle, and sentimental. Cancer is represented by the crab, after all, and it takes some time to coax them out of their shell and show off their soft inner selves.

Your Cancer boy is the king of cuddle puddles. He’s ruled by the Moon, which in astrology represents feelings and one’s inner self. As a result, he’s sweet, romantic, and a total softie. The crab is often considered one of the most sensitive signs of the zodiac, so basically he’ll do everything with love in mind, which makes for an incredibly romantic and magical partner. Aww!

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If you like to spend quiet evenings on the couch with your boo, watching Netflix and resting your head on his shoulder, look for a Cancer! He loves to spend time at home as opposed to lots of traveling and socializing. Crabs live in their shell and carry their home on their back wherever they go. They’re slow-moving critters too. Your Cancer man is the same—he’s a homebody, and a relationship with him moves along gently and steadily, with no alarms or surprises. He is a nurturer and will take care of everyone he cares about, especially his partner. In fact, he tends to have a blind spot for his lover and easily overlooks their flaws.

Being a water sign, there’s an abundance of emotion in his soul, and he needs to feel comfortable enough to express his feelings with you. He takes trust and commitment very seriously, needing a lot of reassurance and open communication. Sure, he’s a great listener and is amazingly receptive, but actively expressing his own emotions isn’t the easiest. Without encouragement from you, he can keep his feelings bottled up. But if you invite him to open up, he’ll share a rainbow of emotions with you. He’s typically attracted to people who are just as empathetic as he is and who have a deep emotional understanding. He’ll feel your highest highs and lowest lows right along with you, with the same amount of intensity too.

Cancer wants a relationship that feels like home, so there’s a certain amount of security he requires. Hookups aren’t really his thing, because he knows that if he’s physically intimate with someone, he catches feels quick. And in general, it’ll take you a while to get out of the talking phase with him, but once he feels safe, he’s committed. He’ll shower you with gifts and make it known to the world how much he loves you, especially to his family and friends. That means a ton of PDA, so expect hand-holding and neck kisses, both in private and in public.

Old-school charm and chivalry lives on through Cancer men. Wining and dining and Netflix and chillin’ are his go-to date nights, during which he’ll give you his undivided attention and likely hype you up with extensive compliments. Sexually, he’s a true romantic above anything else and looks for intimate and erotic moments to get him going. Sex is slow, with lots of body contact and emotional connection, mirroring the overall relationship. He is dedicated to pleasing you (expect lots of oral and orgasms).


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He’s a traditionalist and passionate, so a Cancer man in love will have marriage and family on his mind before all else. As a father, he’s very involved in his kids’ lives and holds family values close to his heart. He’ll do anything to provide for his family and keep the peace in the household. Cancer men have a laser-focused work ethic and, as with all things in their life, are very loyal to their job and coworkers. Don’t be surprised if your Cancer man develops a deep connection and friendship with his colleagues. He legit just can’t help his caring and supportive personality. But beware, sometimes they can overwork themselves and as a result will feel emotionally unstable for long periods of time.

Of course, this abundance of emotion can backfire when a Cancer man is not in a good mood. His sensitivity and need for assurance can make him really needy and draining at times. And yes, while his commitment to you is obviously a huge plus, the flip side is it can turn to clinginess, which is likely due to low self-esteem and insecurity. You might struggle to do anything by yourself, and when you address it, he might take it the wrong way and think you just don’t like him. It’s common for him to cling and obsess over you—or really any situation, for that matter. Yes, he can get a little jealous. He’ll always want answers, since it’s hard for him to let go of something that bothers him. A possible solution? Look for a Cancer who has a strong passion or hobby outside of his relationships (a good rule of thumb for all partners, TBH).

He’s consumed with nostalgia, which can be sentimental but more often than not comes off as remembering his former glory days. He can be negative and want to live in the past of “how it used to be.” Sometimes, this can lead him to channel his creative side to make up for what has been lost. But other times, he can develop a fear of change and progression that will ultimately leave him stuck in what once was.

He also can get very passive and quiet. He will follow your lead and is very compliant in providing you with what you want but won’t speak up if he feels neglected (even if his feelings of being ignored are just a wistful by-product of his eternal moodiness). Instead, he recedes further into his shell, and if you aren’t able to coax him out fast enough, he might lash out with those claws of his.

And while he’s not normally unpredictable in his actions, a Cancer man can have major mood swings. He can go from friendly and loving to bitter and reserved, and you may never know why. Unfortunately, wounded and damaged feelings are difficult to heal, and he can spend a lifetime holding onto a grudge.

This guy has a lot of walls and only lets them down when he’s one hundred percent sure he can trust you, so open up! When he’s ready to go to the next level in your relationship, he will, but pushing him out of his comfort zone in any way is a big no-no. If you’re together, he’ll put his heart in your hands, so be extra careful with it! Ragging too much on the parts of himself he’s insecure about is a surefire way to start drama. He’s full of love and will forgive you, but a Cancer never forgets.

If you two are in love, he will be loyal, and be your best friend forever. He’s the type of guy you know you can always rely on, and he’ll always be there to lend a hand to whoever may need it. If you’re looking for someone who you can be extra, unabashedly cheesy with, he’s your lobster—er, crab.

Follow Jake on Instagram.


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