Mad Men, screenshot
Here's the bottom line people — no matter who you are, no matter what you've done, always go to work the day after a Wall Street holiday party.
One caring reader was kind enough to share this teachable moment with Business Insider demonstrating the consequences of failing to do so.
It was the mid-90s, and in those days Wall Street was throwing bull market parties the likes of which today's youngsters likely have not seen. This specific holiday party, thrown by New York City hedge fund, was Brazilian themed.
And at this party, the hedge fund CEO's assistant was super drunk, making out with a young gentleman sales trader from a bulge bracket firm. They were really going at it, and the CEO — concerned that this relatively new assistant did not know the unwritten rule of show-up-the-next-day — took his assistant aside when she came up for air.
He told her that she had to be at work the next day. Other than that, have at it.
And she did. She went home with this young gentleman sales trader, but she did not go to work the next day.
That's when a bunch of mischievous traders at this hedge fund decided to get creative.
A trader at the fund decided to call this young gentleman trader's firm and talk to god — the head trader at this young gentleman's firm. He told god the entire story.
Next thing this young gentleman knows, god is on the hoot and holler (for you kids, that's basically the global bank intercom) summoning this young gentleman to his desk.
The word is that god whispered in this young gentleman's ear, and afterward, the young gentleman stood up on his chair and said something like the following:
"I acted inappropriately with an employee of a very important client of this firm at a Christmas party last night. She is still at my apartment. I have to go wake her up and get her back to work."
This young gentleman trader left his office and did just that.
When he and the young lady appeared at her hedge fund, the entire hedge fund trading floor was waiting to greet them.
The young gentleman went on to cover that hedge fund for some time.
The young lady was eventually fired.
Show up people, show up.
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