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No, I Would Not Let This Robot Stab Around My Hand With a Knife

Madison Malone Kircher

Robots are mostly good. Or useful. Sometimes even both. There’s this one that prints and lights Trump’s tweets on fire. And this little creepy-shaped dude who responds solely in GIFs. And who could forgot this one who earned the love of a tiny human child. (Okay, that one is technically a water heater, but just go with it.) Today’s robot, however, is bad. Very bad. Today’s robot is engineered to play a game of five-finger filet — you know the one where a knife dances dangerously close to your fingers — with a human subject.

Nope. Nope. Absolutely not.

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